Two Steps Forward©

The mysteries of love. The ups and downs of love. It dazzles and frazzles me. And just when I think I have it all figured out in my mind, in my heart - something new comes along to knock me off my feet or kick me in the stomach.
Have you ever done something so silly, so crazy while going through the phases of healing from a break-up that you too ashamed to tell even your bestfriend? Driven by his house to see if he's home - and alone, replayed an old message that she left when things were good. When she would tell you how much she loved you. Reading old letters or cards, staring and crying at pictures. Sleeping in a t-shirt he left behind because it still smells like him. Dialing the first part of her number and then hanging up.
The things we do in the name of love...the end of love....

Two Steps Forward

I did it again, took
Two Steps Forward
and one back
He's like a drug to me
and I can't control myself
looking at old pictures
listening to old messages
Two Steps Forward
and one back
Finding a reason to call
enjoying things we used to do together
dreaming about him
her
Two Steps Forward
and one back
Sitting at home, staring at the walls
for hours and hours
thinking about an ex
an ex!
staring at the phone, willing it to ring
Two Steps Forward
and one back
I feel like I'm on an emotional roller coaster
up one day with joy, happy he's gone
down yet another day, hoping he returns
like an addict, the withdrawal pains are intense
Two Steps Forward
and one back
There should be a group for this
or a great blue pill to take for this
just some kind of way - any way to cure me of this
a way to allow the memories to fade enough
But
I know that the
Two Steps Forward
bring me closer to the end
And the
one step back
allow me to learn the lesson
And
one day
without pills
group therapy
phone calls
or roller coasters
Time
will heal all things
will heal me
And I'll simply look forward
and I will not look back